Partner

This book is at the top of my list of recommended reading for singles that want to find a successful life partnership. It is easy to read, jargon-free, and thorough, addressing all the topics important to preparing for and finding a mate. An effective tool in my relationship coaching work, it is the only book I purchase in bulk to give to clients.

By reading this book and completing the exercises, a single person can attain the necessary knowledge and clarity to make good relationship choices leading to a fulfilling life partnership. Experience relationship success and avoid relationship failure by reading this book!

-David Steele, MA, LMFCC President, LifeParterQuest Relationship Coaching Resources http://www.LifePartnerQuest.com

This book presents a good understanding about the hidden logic of falling in love. It is a known fact that we feel attracted to partners who (mostly subconscously) remind us of our first love-relationship in life - the one with our parents. The urge to heal old wounds by "getting it right this time" make the chemistry it takes for us to pursue a relationship, even if it brings back the very painful and unhealthy emotions we suffered from in the past! The book also includes several exercises that enable the reader to gain new insights into their own relationhship history and any unconscious patterns associated with it. For anyone interested in finding out why certain people seem to end up in the same unhappy relationship situations over and over again - and at the same time learning something about yourself, this is a highly recommendable book.

This is the only book I know on the subject (there are lots of books on grief, but it's nice to have a book focused on gay men, since our situtations can be vastly different), and when I lost my partner, reading Gay Widowers provided a great deal of relief and information. Knowing that I wasn't alone, and reading about similar experiences was (and still is) important to my bereavement. I actually wish the book was longer.

The death of someone close to you is a pivotal event in your life. The closer that death is to you, the more difficult are the issues that present themselves. Be it a partner or a parent, a sibling, a close relative, or a pet, each death you encounter in life will surely affect you deeply, and also will provide opportunities for dynamic personal growth.

Lesbians, gay men, bisexuals, and transgendered people deal with issues of grief, loss, and bereavement in their lives. In our society unfortunately, members of this community find it much more difficult to address honestly and openly, those details and intimate emotions surrounding the death of a loved one. Fears of rejection, hostility, constant explanation and ignorance often make it impossible for a gay man or a lesbian, for example, to join a mixed group and openly share many details of their lives. Add to this the factor of the impact of AIDS onto those communities, and the potential for problems can escalate quickly.

This book reveals both personal stories and usable information on the reactions gay men have to grief. Through the use of anecdotes and timely analysis, one gets a more complete picture of the incredible passage gay men undergo in their grief journeys.

I currently am a grief counselor for The Hospice Caring Project of Santa Cruz and we have been involved in GLBT greif and bereavement since the early days of the AIDS epidemic. We are now offering to the LGBT Community a renewed outreach due to an increase in both AIDS deaths and deaths due to breast and ovarian cancers. A similar book needs to be written for the lesbian community.

After all that's been written about Lafayette, this book was a complete surprise. It added much to read of his wife's devotion and abilities and their lifelong relationship. It also places them in history, and by reading their letters, you are introduced to them directly. This book is not only entertaining but scholarly. Should be in every college library.

After reading both Unger and Kramer on the astounding life of General Lafayette, I was very curious about his wife. This book of letters and history concerning her life of privilege and partnership is a complement to what most people know about her famous husband. Both the American and French Revolutions were pivotal in their life together of sharing their wealth to the very end. Adrienne generously gave the peasants working her land the best circumstances of the day, while Lafayette at age 18 bought and outfitted a ship to help the colonies win freedom. Three daughters and a son were born while the General was going back and forth across the Atlantic to muster more help from the French for the new nation. Their only son was named George Washington Lafayette and he escaped being imprisoned due to his mother's clever arrangement. Before she joined her husband in prison voluntarily, she snuck her son out of France to be raised for several years by Martha and George Washington. Lafayette's two daughters also joined their father in prison. When Lafayette was not allowed to enter France, his wife pursued their family interests in war torn Paris and environs. She regained La Grange for Lafayette's retirement. He survived Adrienne by almost 30 years at this lovely chateaux and never remarried. She died at 50 due to her illness contracted at the prison where she decided to join her beloved husband. Many relatives were guillotined, so Adrienne arranged their burial site at Picpus Cemetery to be close to the thousands dumped in a mass grave. An American flag flys over their grave for they were both truely "Partners in Liberty's Cause." Lafayette took a triumphal tour of all the United States and returned to France with American soil to spread over their graves. Both equal partners and generous souls.

I cannot express how much this book has helped me understand what's going on in my family. A lot of arguments in my family center around who said what, how they said it, and why they said it. And Tannen provides almost all of the tools necessary for us to even think about reconciling.

This really is an enlightening book. What it does do, is explain what goes on in a particular aspect of any family - she explains how family arguments and conversations work, why some things are said but other left unsaid, and provides some suggestions and advice for going back and fixing some of those misunderstandings. She provides a really comprehensive overview of whole family setups, organizations, and tons of possible situations.

She doesn't say "here's how to fix your problems - they shall all be solved". She can't - she's not your own psychologist. But there is so much information to work with, that for a majority of families this will definitely provide a really good and solid basis for reconciling, and even allowing family members to start talking to each other civily again.

Tannen has done tons of research, and provides many examples from all types of families throughout the whole book - grandparents, partners, families with children, families without children, cross-culture families, etc.. I do have to completely agree with another reader that the examples Tannen gives could have been plucked straight from my life. I found one line in particular that could actually explain away years of misunderstanding between two whole branches of my family, myself included. It's also a very fast read - I read it through in just a few days, and I'm a slow reader.

If anyone in your family is even remotely having difficulties talking to others in your family, you should buy this book. I can't tell you how much it's helped me already. Had to buy two more copies of the book for other family members to "borrow".

This book is one I will reread over and over again. I wanted to highlight everything because the innumerous examples could have been plucked right out out of my own life.

Deborah Tannen explains so logically how linguistics can cause all types of mixed messages during an interaction with someone. Even when our intentions are good, it's now easy to see how we could be misinterpreted and how fights and long held grudges could be avoided or amended.

Because of this book, I now have an objective, aerial view of situations before they get out of hand with flying accusations. Deborah Tannen has given me insight into "enemy camp" and I realize now that someone I perceive as my enemy, may not be after all. That's a huge relief and a sure recipe for less painful drama in my life.

We each have grieved or know someone who is grieving over a death of a partner. This book guides one through the universal human mourning process. Laurie and Ruth's book is a learning tool that should be available in every hospital, place of worship, and home for it is a guiding light on the path of darkness. It gives strength to those in need.

my friend lost his wife of 40+ years to cancer this passed September.I gave him the book as his birthday present, one week after he became a widower. My frined loved the book, and told me that by now he read it 4 times. So, congratulations to Ruth and Laurie whom I personally know and appreciate the information they are sharing with so many people, based on their own personal experience after loosing their husband and father. An ideal gift for someone who lost their spouse!

Three kids in crime. One day three kids Maxie, Earl, and Rosie got in trouble for a little something that they did in homeroom so they got sent to Mr. Shivers office. But Mr. Shivers could't get to them so he said "come back early Monday morning". The secretary Mrs. Trumbull gave them a hall pass. Maxie said "lets leave, sense Mr. Shivers thinks that we are in class and our teachers think that we are still in the office". So they did but it took some brains to leave school. On Saturday they got together and thought about how they were going to tell Mr. Shivers about what they did. One kid said "lets just tell the truth". So early Monday morning they went to the office and Mr. Shivers took them one at a time and he didn't even talk about the dumpster thing so they were all off the hook.

I loved the book because I liked how the author put everything together and how the author only said about two days. I liked how they thought they were going to get in trouble but they didn't.

Maxie, Rosie and Earl are outcasts. Maxie Zuckerman is a brainiac; so smart that the other kids in his class make fun of him for getting all A's---but his problem could be solved if only the teacher agreed to move him to the front of the class. Rosie Swanson is a snitch; her teacher frequently has to speak to her about her habit of constantly writing notes... To him. She writes notes to him and tattles on everyone in her class. But she has her reasons. After all, her grandfather was a detective, of course...
And Earl Wilber is overweight. Plus he's a wimp. And he's the new kid.
All three wonderfully individual characters meet in the principal's office---Maxie because he finally got fed up with his classmates bullying him and got a little out of control with the craft supplies, Rosie because she was passing notes to the teacher again, and Earl because he refused to read in front of the class. (He has reasons, too. Last time he tried to it came out horribly wrong.)
But, when the principal turns out to be too busy to see them and excuses them from his office until Monday... Their teachers think they're at the office. And the principal thinks they're in class.
So they have the perfect chance to escape.

This book is hilarious. Barbara Park is a brilliant writer, humorous and capable of telling a story with genuine realism as a child. Children will relate to this book, to the feeling of being different... And sometimes just needing to get out. It doesn't actually encourage skipping school, by the way. In fact, it sort of even discourages it.
Read it! The characters are quirky and funny and real. They could be actual children speaking to you. Also, it's just... Entertaining. There's no other way to put it.

This book is pretty much the "bible" of Domestic Violence Survivors. I want to personally thank Ginny Nicarthy, it was this very book that gave me the push I needed to take a stand and leave my abusive husband. This book opens the door to self-empowerment. It gives real true to life stories of the brave women who have endured such herendous abuses at the hands of the very men that claimed to love them. This book also kept me focused on what lie ahead, a long journey of self-discovery necessary to empower myself so that I would not be destined to attract the same kind of mate. I learned that as a strong independant woman, I am somebody! I can make a difference in this world and I can teach my daughter to value her thoughts and feelings, so that others will too.

I read this book and found that it gives great encouragement and insights into the problems that women in abusive relationships have. It gives women courage. You can also see that you are not necessarily doomed to repeat past failed relationships. I recommend it highly!

This tight, dark, authentic police procedural matches two very human detectives with a worthy opponent, a serial killer who is so creepy yet believable that you won't stop reading until he's been caught. A terrific insider's view of NYC, police work and the criminal mind.

David Cray's new police procedural, "Partners," is a gritty look at how a petty criminal becomes a cruel predator. Twenty-seven year old Jorge "Finito" Rakowski is a small-time hood blessed with startling good looks but little else. Recently released from Rikers, with a long rap sheet, no education, and no job prospects, Finito relies mostly on theft to keep him afloat financially. Finito soon discovers, much to his surprise, that he derives enormous satisfaction from killing women.

New York City police detecives Belinda Moore and Pudge Pedersson are partners. As friends, they discuss their hopes, fears, and disappointments, and as professionals, they work well together. Pudge and Belinda are convinced that one man is behind the murders of quite a few young women in recent months. Their bosses do not agree with this theory, and they make Moore's and Pedersson's lives increasingly difficult. However, Belinda and Pudge are old-fashioned cops who care about the victims, and they are determined to catch the killer any way they can.

Cray has done an excellent job of getting inside the minds of both a serial killer and the detectives who seek to bring him down. We get to know Finito Rakowski, who is equal parts con artist, immature little boy, and sociopath. We also become well acquainted with the two detectives, Moore and Pedersson, who have the same irritating personal problems that everyone else has, but who are focused on getting results when they are on the job.

Cray's writing is smooth and occasionally darkly humorous, his plotting is fast-paced and exciting, and his depiction of police procedure is authentic and engrossing. I highly recommend "Partners" for an inside look at the grim world of two homicide detectives.

I am a legally blind former Dairy Herdsnam. I was enthralled by the stories in this book, and grateful for the info given about the different guide dog schools. It helped make my choice of which school to apply for a dog easier. I think this book should be required reading for anyone entereing the special needs/education professions!

As someone who suffers from a disability (epilepsy), it was a pleasure to learn that not only wasn't I alone, but that my seizure alert dog is part of a greater whole. The assistance dog movement is growing and through this book more people will learn of its benefits.

Anyone seeking greater self-awareness and/or a deeper understanding of the complexity of BDSM relationships can learn a great deal from "Partners in Power." No matter whether one is a neophyte to BDSM or an experienced player, the truth is that life offers so many opportunities to continue learning and exploring, and it is wonderful to have resources such as this book to edify, to enlighten and to guide.

Mr. Rinella's book features an amazing composition of philosophical axioms, scholarly excerpts, personal vignettes, and practical mechanisms for seeking knowledge, such as "The Scientific Method." His style of writing connects exceedingly well with readers and he conveys his knowledge in such a way that it is insightful, eloquent and pedagogical without being preachy or patronizing.

I would highly recommend the book to anyone seeking greater knowledge and understanding of kinky relationships.

Throughout this book, I found myself agreeing with a lot of what Jack has to say. His words resonate with my philosophies about BDSM. As some of you know, he has a weekly email column called "Leather Views" and reading this book in some ways is like an extended version of one of his column. His writing is always entertaining and usually thought-provoking, as is this book.

Since this book applies to leather relationships, most chapters are devoted to topics relating to these kinds of relationships. From the beginning chapter on "leather vocabulary," to the chapter called "Archetypes of SM relationships," to chapters on "knowing yourself" and "knowing what you want" in a SM partner. And he devotes a separate chapter to looking for partners. There's a lot of advice he offers that a lot of us don't always follow but should. There are also chapters that discuss the pros and cons of monogamy versus polygamy, the concept of "clubs" and "leather families," and relationship problems (he calls them "elephants in the room").

Jack offers his thoughts in a well thought out manner and raises points all of us in SM relationships should consider either before we enter into one or how to deal with issues once we are in one. An excellent book overall.